Stallone Announces Really Over the Top Trilogy
Hollywood, CA–With the latest kill-murder rampage of 80s movie icon John J. Rambo stacking up cash at the box office 20 years after the last installment, actor-auteur Sylvester Stallone revealed his next project Thursday: back-to-back sequels to his 1987 trucker/arm wrestling opus, Over the Top, in which he played Lincoln Hawk, a ball-cap loving trucker turned arm wrestling champ. The sequels, currently titled Even Overer the Top: Hawk’s Flight and So Far Over the Top: Bone Breakin’ Boogaloo, are expected to arrive in theaters Christmas 2010 and 2011.
“With today’s visual effect fire-power to really give the audience the true experience of greasy, sweaty, muscle-flexing arm wrestling, I feel the time is right to reintroduce a new generation to Lincoln Hawk and the mysterious world of trucker arm wrestling,” Stallone no doubt mumbled as his publicist penned the press release. “But the only way to do it right is as a trilogy, filmed simultaneously. In 3-D.”
The plot for the sequels was not discussed in the press release and reports indicate it is under such tight security protocols a script has not even been allowed to be written. However, according to an anonymous source Even Overer the Top: Hawk’s Flight will begin with Hawk’s character as a much more isolated, cynical person than seen in the first movie. “He’s been driving his big rig for the last 20 years all alone on the road. His kid hates him after realizing in his teens that Hawk’s actions during the first movie removed him from a life of wealth, privilege, and free Paris Hilton sex. But when a sudden event forces Hawk back into the arm wrestling box, the act of squeezing, rubbing, holding another human’s hand as he snaps his opponent’s forearm in half sets Hawk on a course back to his humanity,” said the anonymous source who fears for his life if his name were to be revealed.
It is still unknown if any other cast members from the original installment will return for the sequels. However, according to David Mendenhall’s manager at Burger King, Mendenhall’s slate will be wide open next week if he doesn’t clean the goddamn gristle off the fry cooker real pronto like.
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